In a world that tells us to chase big outcomes, the science is surprisingly clear – small positive moments, small progress and small acts of connection are what actually build resilience, motivation and well-being over time.
You may have seen my video post last week as I was wandering through Fitzroy gardens in Melbourne. It was a beautiful morning, the sun was shining, the park maintenance team were busy with lawn mowers and blowing away the leaves (umm…literally my dream job!). If not, here’s the link to my post. https://www.linkedin.com/posts/traceywaring_when-meeting-people-and-learning-new-things-activity-7428038666142502912-uRBj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=member_desktop&rcm=ACoAAA3zy-0BFioufQlHV4b9fh_OKi2kX-UlyQc
As you may have seen, nothing dramatic was happening.
∞ No big breakthroughs.
∞ No urgent decisions.
∞ No major milestones.
Just a beautiful park, fresh air, the cathodic hum of a leaf blower… and a sense of calm that I hadn’t realised I needed. It was a chance for me to reflect on the amazing things I “get” to do and the people I get the privilege and pleasure of meeting and connecting with.
It struck me how easy it is, especially in a world that feels busy, noisy and often overwhelming, to overlook the small things that quietly hold us together. The things we can so often take for granted.
Because we are conditioned to look for the big things.
∞ The big goals.
∞ The big wins.
∞ The big moves.
Yet in reality, it’s often the seemingly small things that carry us through and can make the biggest difference.
When life feels heavy, start small
Over the past few weeks, I’ve had conversations with people navigating all kinds of challenges – career uncertainty, health issues, relationship challenges, family struggles, caring for ageing parents, organisational change, searching for jobs in an uncertain market, global uncertainty, and everything in between.
And in those moments, focusing on “the elephant” (i.e., the big picture) can literally feel suffocating – like it is sitting on your chest!
But focusing on something small?
∞ That’s manageable.
∞ That’s grounding.
∞ That’s human.
Maybe it’s a short walk in a park or somewhere where there is greenery and stopping to observe the beauty.
Perhaps it is a conversation with someone who “gets you.” Maybe it is learning something new or finishing that small task. Maybe it is meeting someone new (or someone old) and sharing a moment of laughter on an otherwise hard day.
My great friend Helen and I at the Cricketers in Cobham, Surrey, England
These things don’t fix everything – but they can change how we experience everything.
The science behind the small things
It turns out there is strong scientific evidence behind what many of us instinctively feel.
Research in psychology and neuroscience shows that those seemingly small positive moments – feelings of gratitude, connection, curiosity or joy – actually broaden our thinking, reduce stress and build resilience over time.
In other words, the small positives matter – they add up over time.
Another fascinating finding is the importance of celebrating and acknowledging progress. In their book, The Progress Principle, Teresa Amabile and Steven Kramer argue that making consistent, small, and meaningful progress is the biggest driver of motivation, creativity, and productivity at work. That is, celebrating small wins, rather than waiting for the final outcome (e.g., winning a race or a proposal at work). It’s not the big breakthroughs that makes the difference – it’s the small progress.
And perhaps most importantly, our brains are wired to focus on threats and negatives. Dr Rick Hanson’s work backs this up and his famous quote explains it “The brain is like Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones.” Which basically means if we don’t intentionally notice the good, the simple, the meaningful moments, will slip by unnoticed.
Tony Robbins’ work also addresses this concept when he points out:
This is not just a catchy phrase – it has been proven by people far smarter than me that attention literally shapes how our brain interprets reality. You’ve probably experienced this in your own life. Ever started a diet, commenced your quit smoking/drinking campaign or decided to buy a red car? From that moment on, you suddenly see people eating burgers, people smoking or drinking or red cars…everywhere!
And the musicians have figured it out too
And it isn’t just the scientists and researchers who have figured out the power of the small things. The musicians are on to it as well [and sorry (not sorry) if these songs get stuck in your head 😊]. Here’s just a few that popped into my head.
∞ “All the small things” Blink 182: it highlights that small, everyday gestures of affection – like leaving roses on stairs (a line in the song) – matter more in a relationship than grand gestures
∞ “What a wonderful world” Louis Armstrong: a timeless anthem that highlights the beauty in the everyday – trees of green, red roses, and the simple magic of life.
∞ “Here Comes the Sun” – The Beatles: Celebrates finding hope and relief in small, sunny moments after a difficult time.
∞ “The Bare Necessities” – Phil Harris (from The Jungle Book): A cheerful reminder that you don’t need much to be happy.
But small doesn’t always mean insignificant
Some of the most important moments in our lives don’t look impressive on paper. They may not be headline moments – but they can be turning points, or simply moments of joy – if we choose to see them.
∞ A conversation that changes how you see yourself.
∞ A decision to try again.
∞ A moment of kindness right when you needed it.
∞ Straight edges on your lawn after you’ve edged and mowed them [or maybe that’s just me!]
My beautiful straight lawn edges post my lawn mowing session – the simple pleasures in life!
∞ Choosing to learn rather than withdraw.
∞ Seeing something good in what initially felt like a disaster.
I often think about how many opportunities, relationships, insights and breakthroughs have started with something that seemed small at the time.
∞ A coffee.
∞ A question.
∞ A moment of curiosity.
∞ Someone sitting in one of your presentations in London (unbeknownst to you) and then 5 years later, you are working together on projects because you had an impact on their life
∞ A decision to show up anyway.
Small actions create new paths.
The small things are what keep us human
In a world that can sometimes feel like we are drowning in complexity, speed, comparison, hate, violence and noise, focusing on the small things is not avoidance – it is restoration. It’s hope.
Stopping to smell the roses is not laziness. Celebrating small wins is not lowering standards. Looking for the good is not naïve optimism. It is how we sustain ourselves for the long game.
It is also how we rewire our brains to find the positives. Emmons & McCullough in their Counting blessings versus burdens research paper found that focusing on small positives shifts attention systems in the brain (the reticular activating system to be precise) toward noticing more positives.
We should care about this because:
∞ Small things regulate the nervous system
∞ Small things shape attention
∞ Small things build resilience
∞ Small things create momentum
∞ Small things deepen connection
Also, success, fulfillment, contribution and meaning are not built in giant leaps – they are built in quiet, consistent steps that often go unnoticed by others and sometimes us, if we let it.
And finally and perhaps most importantly, focusing on small things brings us back to what matters most:
∞ Connection.
∞ Presence.
∞ Gratitude.
∞ Learning.
∞ Perspective.
A gentle reminder
If you are going through something challenging right now – professionally or personally – you don’t have to solve everything at once.
Start small.
What is one thing you can do today that moves you forward even slightly?
What is one thing you can appreciate, learn from, or find meaning in – even if the situation itself is hard?
Sometimes the smallest shift in focus can change everything.
Closing thought
The big moments in life are often rare.
But the small ones are available every day – if we choose to notice them.
And over time, those small things quietly shape the direction of our careers, our lives and the legacy we live and leave behind.
About “The Power of…” newsletter series
These newsletters are a way for me to share practical reflections, insights and tools on what really matters – the small shifts that can make a big difference to career, life and legacy.
